Lunar Whale to the moon! Let’s beat up behemoths, bahamuts, and one iron giant who enjoys being a gun. Meet our new friend, a beard with claws. Meet our old frenemy, Kain, who can’t make up his mind about anything. We scheme to keep him as our pet mini pig-frog. You might assume CPU stands for “central processing unit” but no, it’s definitely something else. Transporters are scary. Special music for coffee shop scene: "Happy Afternoon - Lopkerjo Jazz 902 by LOPKERJO" https://freemusicarchive.org/music/john-lopker/happy-day-usa/happy-afternoon-lopkerjo-jazz-902/ CC BY 4.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/
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1:21:25
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1:21:25
Moons Over Mysidia (FF4 Part 4)
Edge’s parents meet a terrible fate. Can ninjas walk through walls? We get a sweet new hovercraft grabber for our airship. Dwarves are incredibly generous and possibly don't know about lying. Who spilled all this lava and acid on the floor? Remy finds a new vocational calling. How did Leviathan and Asura meet? Why are these doors so mean? We do a little escapism. Stops at the Adamant Grotto, Eblan Castle, Cave of Summons, the Feymarch, Sylph Cave, Sealed Cave, and the swear zone 'cause we're not bleeping those cusses anymore. Sorry, cool babies.
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1:35:07
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1:35:07
Towers, Crystals, and Corpses (FF4 Part 3)
This episode takes us from Troya to the Magnetic Cave to Mithril to Agart and, finally, straight into a battle between dwarf tanks and flying airships full of monsters. Luckily the only people who die are the ones closest to us with the most to live for. Aw heck. You better not bring any of that metal crap into MY magnet cave, bro. Edward knows a song dark elves hate. Please stop feasting on my blood, Zubats. If I had a quarter for every time I ran into a high tech tower in this episode, I would have two quarters -- which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice in one episode. This episode’s swear jar, on the other hand, overflows. At the beginning of this episode we describe the twins doing an act of heroic self-sacrifice in the last leg a la Minwu as a “Min-two” when “Twinwu” was right there and we're so mad at ourselves for not seeing it.
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1:54:28
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1:54:28
Bomby Mommy (FF4 Part 2)
Rydia works through her aversion to fire. Mom Bomb blows up. Edward teaches us the power of music. We fail to protect a castle. A few children are lost – but only one of them has been eaten by a sea monster. Shiver me timbers!
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1:51:58
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1:51:58
No Offense to Gilberts (FF4 Part 1)
Water vapor attacks! A ring commits war crimes. Cecil follows orders until he doesn’t. A dancer has something special to show us. A bug bogarts treasure medicine. Disney Princess powers are tested. Excrescence is collected. A fish person crashes Edward’s night time sad song sesh. We are all spoony bards on this blessed day. Hi, Brian.
Two millennials with maxed out goofball stats tackle one of the biggest video game series of all time. Mike (lifelong superfan) initiates Remy (total FF newbie) into the arcane secrets of Final Fantasy one game at a time. Ridiculousness ensues. Friendships are tested. Each episode, more final than the last.
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